Akogun Akomolafe

  • 25 January 2019 at 08 : 26 AM

    Computerese

    Posted by in Blog , News , Polemics , Random Musings , Satire 0

    From my archives. A satire by Femi Akomolafe   I was consuming a large portion of rice with stew, fish and the works when Joe Appiah burst in, sweating profusely like a marathon runner. His whiskers were quivering like leaves in a harmattan wind. Having raced the stairs to my second-floor domicile, he was panting […]

     

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  • 20 January 2019 at 22 : 02 PM

    From my Archives: Nigeria: The Curse Of Reluctant Leaders

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    From my Archives: Nigeria: The Curse Of Reluctant Leaders   It is said that “ifs” are useless tools of historical analyses; but one cannot but wonder what the trajectory of the Nigeria nation would have been IF she been blessed with leaders with vision in the mold of Kwame Nkrumah, Lee Kuan Yew, or Mahathir […]

     

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  • 20 January 2019 at 22 : 52 PM

    Making our education relevant

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    From my archives: Making our education relevant   Methinks that education should be part of society’s tool of development. In many countries outside Africa that I know, universities and polytechnics and other tertiary institutions are closely linked with industries and agriculture. Of course, since the state’s set the agenda, it also has a lot to […]

     

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  • 20 January 2019 at 22 : 30 PM

    G8 +4 and other Jazz

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    From my Archives: G8 +4 and other Jazz   Wow, who say there is no God! I will praise thy name, oh my savior, I will praise thee for ever more… My brother, what is going on, what is the good tiding? Ah, my brother, this good news is too good to be true. Ah, […]

     

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  • 20 January 2019 at 22 : 14 PM

    For Nigerians, Life Is April Fools’ Day

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    From my Archives: For Nigerians, Life Is April Fools’ Day   My Books on Amazon Africa: it shall be well: https://tinyurl.com/sn64ocd Africa: Destroyed by the gods: https://tinyurl.com/vglfk7w 18 African Fables & Moonlight Stories: https://tinyurl.com/s7qrp4p Try and get your copy. And, please, help me share the links. Kind regards, Femi Akomolafe   Ha, my broda, long […]

     

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  • 16 January 2019 at 08 : 10 AM

    Of Sex and Non-Sex

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    From my Archives   A fellow once described Bill Clinton as a man with the integrity of hyena. I think that was an apt description of this man who, apparently, have problems zipping his pants. At the risk of being deemed judgmental, I must say that I find wily Bill an incredible man to fathom. […]

     

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  • 8 January 2019 at 09 : 10 AM

    Passing the Buck

    Posted by in Blog , Polemics , Random Musings , Satire 0

    Love is pure, harmonious, unselfish and it makes no demands. Marriage is a gymnasium of insincerity, with each partners fine-tuning the acrobatic art of telling sweet lies. Marriage is demanding and competitive; each partner goes into it looking to get the better of the other. Few honest men will tell you that get into marriage because of love. Men go into a marriage to conquer, dominate and become an aristocrat or, as it sometimes happens, out of sheer sympathy. Occasionally, they marry because family and peer pressures are driving them nuts. Women mostly go into it to think of themselves as householders instead of glorified house-keepers or because family pressure has become unbearable. As in most other human institutions, marriage is heavier on women. In marriage, a man gets a housemaid, a bed-mate (or sex-pot), a cook, a mother, a nanny, a dishwasher and a therapist thrown in for good measure. In marriage, a woman gets more undesired, unrequited sex than in prostitution. She lost everything – her name, her privacy, her self-respect, self-esteem and all the attention and the approving nods of all men, just for the indifference and insouciance of one SOB, who sleeps with anything in skirt, and throws tantrums like a three-year-old kid, if his dinner is late or his socks is misplaced or his wife as much as look at another man. In marriage, a woman remains a parenthesis; she’s the wife of so and so, the mother of them and them.

    Are you above making mistakes? Ama was looking for an escape chute.

    Any mortal is capable of mistakes. That’s why they say to err is human. But as I already told you, I don’t agree that such things like making babies should ever be mistakes. They are far too important. That’s why it behooves every lady to be responsible – they are the only people nature endowed with the capacity to be mothers.

    Supposing you’re a lady.

    I don’t like suppositions. To me, my body is a temple; my only temple. Nothing gets into my body except what I approve off. I don’t think that my gender would have made any difference. I believe that every being with enough self- respect can ensure that his\her body is not abused by who\whatsoever. A lady who has enough respect for her body can ensure that no accident will ever happen as far as pregnancy is concerned.

    You are cruel. Ama wailed.

    No, I am not cruel. I am honest.

     

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  • 4 January 2019 at 08 : 07 AM

    The importance of Education for Africans

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    History is very important, especially for Africans. Europeans have so badly distorted history that they have reduced many of us to cringing apologetic beings. We have nothing to apologize for. As Dr. Karenga puts it, we are a non-obligated people. We do not owe the world a damn thing. The world owes us a lot.

    When I say that we do not owe the world thing, no European can say that with conviction. Do not listen to those bleeding-hearts who call themselves ‘liberals.’ They are the worst scum. Those hypocrites are too happy partaking in the loot of their brethren while making noises about squirming in liberal grief!

    Take a map of the world and point to any part where there is strife, where man is butchering man with Old Testament fury, you will find Europeans acting as Military Strategists, Financial Advisors, Logistics Gurus, Tactical Marvels. The whole of the so-called Western-Civilization was built on the blood of non-Westerners. It is the only civilization whichever holds mankind to ransom. They happily called one of their wretched ideas Mutually Assured Destruction (MAD). What a salute to humanity!

    Does it make any sense to you why intelligent beings will waste precious resources and good money to build weapons that could destroy the world several times over? Is it civilized to waste billions of dollars to build weapons and billions more to destroy them when hungry people are sleeping rough in front of their ‘White Houses?’ Is it rational to take pride in carrying pollution to the heavens after creating a huge mess here on earth? Is it rational or logical to spend billions growing unwanted food, and more billions to store and destroy them, just to prop up prices? What civilization watches people die of hunger while food is rotting in silos, all in the name of MARKET FORCES?

    Is that a civilization worthy of envy?

     

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  • 1 January 2019 at 07 : 54 AM

    Western Racist reporting on Africa

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    I say to you guys, bravo! Keep on your good work. Keep on drowning yourself in your primitive racist statistics. Keep on floating in your racist prejudices. ‘But verily, verily I say unto you: If slavery and colonialism did not wipe out Africa, be sure that none of your man-made diseases will do us in. No way, man!’

    In 1994, I wrote a piece in the ‘de Volkskrant,’ I end this letter with the following quote from that article:

    “A few years ago, your so-called scholars and scientists were predicting that Africa would be wiped out by the AIDS virus. Astronomical figures were conjured up to show how we are going to disappear. We are still here and that’s baffling you. You guys just don’t understand. For us, no pestilence; no blight could be more devastating than the slavery you imposed on our continent. No epidemic could drain us of one-hundred million of our strongest and brightest as you Europeans did. Europeans are the worst scourges ravaging Africa. This is the fact of the matter.”

     

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  • 30 December 2018 at 08 : 55 AM

    Germany was a Revelation

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    From my Archives   I have been to Germany (official name: Bundesrepublik Deutschland) before, but this was the first time I went to the country thrice in the same year (2015). Fate and circumstance conspired to make my journeys possible. My first travel to the country was in the late 1980s when I accompanied a […]

     

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